Wednesday, November 30, 2005
♥ 11:03 AM
after i got my results, i went to the conference. i learnt from my cousins that two of them had been playing with our eldest cousin's skate-board. they were like rolling to and fro on the board, while one of them was still holding onto the chair. then, she lost her balance and fell backwards, while another cousin fell on her cause the skate-board went in the other direction. she used her palm to break her fall and was like.. in pain. haha. when they told me, it was really funny.when she went home, she complained that her palm hurt and so her mother brought her to tan tock seng. there, she got a cast cause the doctors said that she fractured her palm in 2 places. haha. get well soon! ♥ 9:52 AM
on thursday, i got my psle results back. when i first went into school, i was so freaked out. its scary you know? then the whole level went up to the hall and waited for our teachers to give us the marks. mr bong brought us up to the ' roof-top ' and we all just stood around. then slowly, one by one, he gave us our results slip.
when i got mine, i quickly folded it in half and went to my parents. by the time i reached them, i had already started crying. they were so worried and was like " what happened? " so i told them that i didnt dare to look at my results and they were like.. " haiyo.. ok la. " then, they 'dragged' me down to the 4th level. diondra's mother saw me crying and asked them what happened. so of course my parents told her. then she was like.. so shocked. she said " emm.. she's quite smart la. dont need to worry. " haha. my mother kinda like laughed..
then, i saw xi nan crying. i went to talk to her, comfort her. she didnt do too well. ( hope your feeling better! ) then, i went into the hall to look for the 03 girls. jia ying and clare were crying already. sadd. aunty betty, beverley's mom, saw me crying and asked me how much i got. i was like.. i have no idea. i think she was quite shocked as well. then she hugged me tight and told me that it was alright.
after that, i went back out to look for my parents. slowly, we looked at the results. i cried even more. i really really cried alot alot. it was really bad. i saw stephen and our eyes meet for a second. he's hair was in a mess ( but it looked better than normal )and i could tell he wasnt really happy. then, i sent my parents home and told them that i would find my own way home.
♥ 9:21 AM
on tuesday wednesday and thursday, there was this conference on austisim. you know the school pathlight? yeah. it took part. and famous people who wrote like books and stuff on austisim came from like.. all over the world. and if you watched the news, you too would know about it.
my aunt was like in charge of the press. if the press had any questions, they would have to ask her. anyway, me and my other cousins were supposed to help out but i was like the first one there. so, my aunt brought me in to listen to the conference. and guess what?! i sat beside the mediacorp news reporter. haha. she got so bored half-way through that she started drawing on the paper that was provided for her.
on the first day, tuesday, i found my idol - stephen shore. he is really really great. i mean really great. he has austisim and if you didnt know, you wouldnt even be able to detact it. he even wrote two books. the first book took him 3 years and the second book 6 months. see what a quick learner he is?!?! haha.
Thursday, November 24, 2005
♥ 2:43 PM
the psle results are out tomorrow and i am scared to death. what if i do real badly?! this is soo nerve-racking. i do hope i do well. oh well.. everything in my next four years lies in the hands of the tomorrow. if i screw up, i screw up for a life-time. gosh. i am dead arent i?
♥ 10:03 AM
on sunday, i went to safra for the stay-over thingy. it was quite enjoyable. when i first got there, i went to put my bag down and chatted with some of the girls for a while. after that, i went to the swimming pool to find min yi, jia yu, bella, lim qian, brandon and bella's brother. they started splashing me with the water la can. then, they went in and we ate some food. once that was done, we went to the playground and started playing catching. haha. i miss playing catching. alot alot. we stayed up till about 2, since ronald decided to drop by for 20 minutes at 1 something in the morning. when we were supposed to be sleeping, min yi and jia yu started to like 'fight' cause jia yu wanted to sleep and min yi didnt.
in the morning, when min yi woke up, i was already awake and jia yu was out of bed. it was like.. 6.30am in the morning.. she rolled onto me and then looked at me. i was like.. move over.. and she went like.. ahh! lol. it was really funny. anyway, after a while, we all went downstairs to watch mtv since there was nothing else to watch. i actually went back to sleep while watching. hah. after, we all went bowling and to the arcade, where they like... spent alot alot of money. after that, they went swimming. when they were done with swimming, we had lunch, which was like kinda late.around 3.
after that, we went to the arcade and spent more money, followed by going to east coast park by bicycles. it was a blast but we like.. were all frusrated after. min yi and crystal went the wrong direction and brandon went wayy too fast. ( he was supposed to lead ) jia yu got so pissed, edna's bike broke, and beverley looked real upset. when we got back to the bungalow, i called my mom and asked her to pick me a.s.a.p. no way was i going to be there with everyone so moody.
♥ 9:22 AM
on saturday, i had tennis. we were playing the league game where you have to get 7 points. so me and my partner, who also happens to be my cousin, had to wait. my cousin is in p4 and is the kind who acts cute. so, she was trying to find out what pms means and was asking our tennis coach, who, by the way, is like the kind who daos people. anyway, she was asking the coach what it meant and so he kinda like told her. the rest of us were all laughing. when he was done, she was like ' can you repeat that?' and he was like ' am i your sex educationer or your tennis coach? ' haha. i was laughing real bad lor.
on the way home, me and all my other cousins, we went to our grandmother's house in one car. we wind down all the windows and started shouting hi to everyone we saw. hah. their expressions were so funny. there was this girl, who dropped her bags and started waving back like as though we actually knew her. hahaha.
on sunday, we had swimming lesson and cause alot of people didnt turn up and there was like only 6 of us, we started fooling aroung. you know the kind of floats that babies wear on their two arms? we started blowing them up and putting them on. then, we swam arouing the pool playing water polo. hee hee.
Sunday, November 20, 2005
♥ 5:05 AM
yesterday was the last day of school. and now. i miss everyone already. so sad. ♥ 4:57 AM
on wednesday, i went out with my cousins and a friend of ours. we laughed. alot alot alot. when we first met each other, we went to k.f.c in cine leisure. that friend didnt dare to go down to the basement cause he said it was haunted. so we insisted on going down. then, we went to taka. after going to a VERY orange shop, hermes, where someone bought something for 6500, we went to coffee bean to get some drinks. on the way to hermes, we saw a gaurd sleeping. his head was like banging down. and he was really old. we ended up laughing VERY lounding at him.
there, we remembered that one of my cousins wanted to be a maid before. so when we were about to leave, the guy was like, hey! clean it up. you need practice for next time. haha. after that, we went to heeren. we took LOADS of neoprints. we spent like.. slightly over 2 hours taking the neoprints. i wanted to take the one with the bars. but for the first time, i like pulled the green thingy down. so much so that we couldnt use the bars without getting the pictures all green. then after, i went back in to sit on the bars. ( some ppl had managed to get the green thingy to go up ) and.. i got stuck. seriously. i was like ' yi shyuan! help me! i'm stuck!' they all ended up laughing real bad at me. hehe.
then, the guy had to call one of my cousins mom to ask if she could have dinner with us. he was like' hello? yes. emm.. auntie told me to tell you that min and her wont be having dinner tonight. ' haha. the maid, who was on the other end, was like.. so confused.
then on the way to plaza sing, another cousin's mom called and asked ' do you miss me? ' the guy was like.. ' huh? yeh... very much. ' haha. my cousin's mom has a ' crush ' on him you see. anyway, we watched sky high at plaza sing. and laughed loads loads more.
Friday, November 18, 2005
♥ 12:57 AM
heyhey.. now having class.. suppose to be watching Yugoslavia. i am soo mixed up between all the countries la can. diondra isnt even watching. hah. all the other p6 pupils are in the hall watching some show. school of rock. thats what diondra and lisa said. they went to the hall just now. ohohoh.. theres more killing now. ew. i see alex rubbing his eyes. so cute. haha. damien is walking about. shane is turning and turning on the chair. lisa? shes on the computer beside me. ( we are in lab 2!! ) shes.. editing her blog. ohhh... i see yuho using the computer as well. ruth too. mr bong just made a speech. seems he doesnt like united states. xi nan just went on the floor. damien STILL walking. i wonder what for. now diondra is laughing cause she's reading everything that i'm writing. i think she thinks it's lame. me too. (=mr bong just gave another speech. haiz.. i really dont understand this video. its so sad. at least thats what lisa just said. she also adds that the video is hers. so sweet aei? now there's a no-hair man talking on the show. he doesnt look innocent. not at all. in fact, i think he looks gay. hehe. i tell you this show is so digusting. there are sooo many dead people. oh now there's a beautiful sea. now the americans are going in to attack. they say there's an excuse now to help. only i have no idea what it is. lame.i have just realised that meng luck's hair is standing up today. he looks.. weird. like the bushy hair guy that just appeared on the screen. there's a man saying they could discuss the details forever. i doubt it. they will need to go to the toilet sooner or later. unless they did it in front of each other. which is just gross.i'll blog later. Thursday, November 17, 2005
♥ 2:31 PM
today was so fun. so funny. i loveee the neoprints. although i still think we oughta take the one with the monkkey bars. not my fault i got stuck and/or that we couldnt work it at first. hehe. will post tomorrow. Wednesday, November 16, 2005
♥ 12:47 PM
to all those whom i have hurt : sorry. i know sorry doesnt even cut it, but i wanna try.
for all the spammers : i dont know whether to say thank you for opening up my eyes or to hate you for upsetting me so much.
to sara and jia ying: i wanna say sorry. sorry for everything. i wish we could still be as close as how we used to be back in p5.
to diondra : thanks for calling me and comforting me, giving me time to prepare myself before actually readin everyone's tags.
to ilovebarney, hoon and seaweed : thanks for helping me and 'supporting' me. ( laughing at what happened with russell is not supporting can. i so embrassed liao lor. )
to bill : thank you for 'guiding' me through and knocking some sense into me.
to dots : i know who you are. thanks anyway.
to 123, 321 and sum1 : please tell everyone who you guys are.
to everyone else who helped me : thanks and sorry for missing out your names.
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
♥ 12:37 PM
what are friends for?
to help you pull through rough times?
to lend you a shoulder when you cry?
to sacrifice every single thing so that they can help you?
well, i'll tell you one thing-
my friends rock.
♥ 11:45 AM
OH.MY.GOSH. i cant believe actually how many people are going against vanessa. hah. see the kinda ending people get when they flirt?? and if you guys are free, go read her tag board. you'll see loads of people against her and like.. 2 people helping her.
Sunday, November 13, 2005
♥ 10:04 AM
the other day, mr bong gave a talk the other day.. on relationships. i SOO wished vanessa was there. then maybe mr bong could have opened her eyes WIDE WIDE and teach her how not to be a flirt. on her tag board in her blog, some person wrote there that she loved ONLY 4 boys. and even said that some of them asked her to go for better boys. and so she did. that person also claimed that it didnt make a flirt. if so, then i ask you people : ' what is a flirt?! '
i mean, isnt it ridiculous? she has been with what? over 10 boys in like.. LESS then half a year. most NORMAL people stay with the same guy for at least a month.. anyway, i think mr bong knocked some sense into me. he said that he watched the movie ' the wedding planner' and the bride's dad and had said that he had taken about 20 years to really love his wife. ( they had an arranged marriage ) and mr bong said :'what is love? do you really love that person? and if you do, what do you love about that person?'after listening to what he had to say, i realised what he said made a whole lot of sense. i mean, if the guy from the movie took 20 years to love his wife, you and i cant possibly love someone overnight or even over a week. we'll probably need quite a few years.so, as a result, i am soo totally over boys. i'm pretty sure God has the right one planned for me in years to come. the other day, i prayed and asked for someone to come and comfort me. and he answered my prayers. a totally unsuspected person smsed me and really really comforted me. but, it was only after that i realised that God had answered my prayers. i dun know why.. but it made a huge impact on me.. it enabled me to like.. move on with life. perhaps its because i know that God is helping me go through all this. for all i know, he's carrying me now. walking beneath me. thank you God. Friday, November 11, 2005
♥ 7:24 AM
for all the people out there, i thought that you might like to know what vanessa said on the day that i broke up with kai yuan.. here it goes..
[ they are in lines cause thats the way they wrote it and entered it.. ]
`` V.C ]]~* ** lurvin u is my promise...~* i wont make a promise i cant keep...i mean it.. says:
erm siyin
i m sry abt it
i reali didnt noe
until mrs soh told me
i promise
u can ask her
i didnt noe onli b4 yesterday
stephen called me
and ask me
wad if
kai lyks u
den i ask kai
wad happen
he day he broke wi du
*wid u
i noe u lurve him alot
we tok abt him al te tym
i wont do anyting
tt hurt my fren
i wish
we wont end our frenship over a boy
i can tel u evryting
includin al te sms he sent me
joanne..
u noe abt te sms rite?
( JOANNE WAS IN THE CONVERSATION )
joanne says : ( thats not her msn nick hor )
yeah
i saw todae
y?
[ i wasnt talking despite their constant requests for me to do so. i deleted those parts. ]
`` V.C ]]~* ** lurvin u is my promise...~* i wont make a promise i cant keep...i mean it.. says:
dont ignore me
i m reali sry
i wan2 tel u evryting.
includin wad he sms me 2day
bt..
wil u feel hurt?
( she remembers i have feelings!! )
if i tel u te truth
wil u hate me
joanne says:
siyin reply lehx
haiz
ur two will euu plz tok and clarify things....
`` V.C ]]~* ** lurvin u is my promise...~* i wont make a promise i cant keep...i mean it.. says:
if onli she could hear evryting..
hope she trust me
haixz..
joanne says :
LOOK INTO TE FUTURE...AND EUU WILL FIND MANY BEAUTIFUL THINGS....
[ the conversation continues...i ask them to shaddup and so on..then i get out of the conversation. after, she says to me.. ]
`` V.C ]]~* ** lurvin u is my promise...~* i wont make a promise i cant keep...i mean it.. says:
te thing i dun understand nw is why r u angry wid me 4 nt tellin u? it's kaiyuan hu is te one hu forced me nt 2 tel u!..i dun lyk him and i wont! i hate him 4 breakin our frenship and I REALI DIDNT MEAN 2 HURT U...i onli lurve jonathan and i onli wil...i wont change my mind, eva AGAIN.
~The End~
Thursday, November 10, 2005
♥ 6:34 PM
after the whole 'drama', i went to bintan with my whole family from my mother's side. when you go in large groups, believe me, it is much more fun. and i think i am qualified to speak, considering the fact that this is the.. forth time i have been to bintan with like 28 other people.
when we first got there, we were all kinda bored. we went to the beach ( the kids only ) after having enough of just sitting around. there, we climbed rocks and it was really really cool. one of my cousins insisted on having a pen that was stuck in between two rocks.. when we finally got it out, we found out it was working.. haha
that night, we watched a show in the master bedroom ( me and four other cousins managed to get permission to sleep there ). it was like.. singapore time 2 something and we were laughing our heads off. the adults outside kept going into the room to keep us quiet.
the next day, they went to swim and played captain's ball. although i didnt swim, i was like so drenched by the time they were done. and, it was really nice watching them practically rape each other for the ball. at night, we went for the laser quest thingy. it was.. 3 boys, one of which is my oldest cousin's best friend ( they are in jc.. age differnece too big to play 24/7 ), against 6 girls. and guess who lost? the girls.. hiaz.. but it was cool to be able to each other scream and freak each other out.
that night, we played a game we invented outselves 'truth or truth'. we asked all sorts of questions and vowed not to let any of the adults know.. i learnt alot about my cousin's friend.. we know he quite well since he always go on these kind of trips wiith us. but i think we all laughed ALOT that night.
i'm gonna end here cause a certain someone requests that my posts be shorter. so.. there.
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
♥ 1:13 PM
to all : diondra and lisa are the bestest friends in 602. ( i'm being forced to do this.. so dun believe hor.. )
Thursday, November 03, 2005
♥ 11:26 AM
today mrs soh came to look for me. she told me that she heard that i had broken up with kai yuan. she told me alot of things that caused my heart to shatter. i actually started crying in front of her. it really hurts you know? it was mrs soh who told me that kai yuan liked vanessa. vanessa didnt even tell me. thats the part which involves her that hurts. i mean, fancy getting information out from a teacher and not from your so-called 'best friend'.
mrs soh wanted to talk to vanessa when she had finished talking to me and really, i couldnt bare the thought of standing next to vanessa, listening to mrs soh tell her not beware of kai yuan, i mean, just on friday, mrs soh was telling that to me!!
when mrs soh called vanessa, i went into the class and hugged xi nan real tight. i am so lucky i have a friends like her or else i will possibly die and not be able to even breathe. and she was really sweet about it. she didnt even ask any questions. she lisa and diondra accompanied me ALL the way down the stairs to the first floor, all the while i was crying my eyes out.
when i got to the first floor, i just stood there and cried some more. that vanessa came up to me and held my hand. ( my brother says she's les. hah ) i really didnt want to talk to her and i was SO on the verge of screaming my head out so i just shrugged off her hand and walked over to jia ying and clare. i already told them what was wrong so i guess they knew. they gave me a space to sit and xi nan came up to me and told me that she had to go. of course i let her go.. i mean, she was so nice already. i just sat on the chair there and cried and cried and cried. jia ying and clare were comforting me and jeanne and joanne took turns talking to me. i dun think i really listened to them. then, sara and bernita appeared and i desperately wanted to go away. i didnt think i would be able to stand them acting like it was no big deal.
i think, when i left, vanessa cried cause she was afraid of me not wanting to be her friend. either that or she was shedding crocodile tears [ as ruth says ]. the second option suits her more i think. hah..
i was supposed to go up to the canteen to wait for jia ying and clare but on the way up, zhi wei came and asked me ' are you ok?' [ see what good friends i have?!?! ] i nodded my head and then, lisa came up to me.. she was like.. ' not v.c's fault lah.. not her fault that kai yuan like her'. i wanted to scream SO much. she was supposed to be MY friend! she promised me!! ( for those people who are close to me, you'll know what i'm talking about ).. i got so fruasted and just went up to the canteen.outside the canteen, lisa's brother, linus, came up and talked to me. he was really sweet and all.. comforting me..
in the canteen, i talked to jia ying and clare some more, while crying even more. as i cried, i felt my whole body shaking.. like it never shoke before.. like as though i was shivering in freezing cold weather. i felt so scared... so.. unprotected. i never felt like this before.. i really never.. but then again, i dun think i have ever liked someone as much as i have ever liked kai yuan. and also, this IS the second time i'm being dumped..
when i got home, i cried even more to my mother.. she was realy nice.. and i'm so thankful i have my mother at home to help me brave through this. she really is the bestest mother. i had turned off my phone since the day before since i really didnt want to hear anything at all from kai yuan. i just knew i would have a mental/emotional breakdown. i didnt turn it on today as well... which is just as well..
anyway, later, when i went online, kai yuan and jonathan both asked me why i blamed vanessa. as if i did.i didnt even talk to her. and worse, she is telling them that i did. i really wanna scream at her, hurt her so bad. but i know i cant.. its just.. i think i really do like kai yuan.. more than she, or anyone else could ever imagine. but its all too late now..
when i was online, they really made me cry again. in my opinion, i am the victim here, not her. so cant they actually care abit more for me instead of for her?! its.. just not fair!! i think.. that this is going to take a longg time for me to recover from.. and until then, i dun think i wanna go to school. it really is quite a blow to me. i mean, i was 'with' kai yuan for like close to a month and all he cares about is vanessa whom hello, is with jonathan. J-O-N-A-T-H-A-N. he didnt even tell me that he wanted to break up! he had his friend tell me!! it just hurts so much. i wanna scream and cry now and every other second and forget everything that has happened. and now, sorry doesnt even help.
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
♥ 8:44 AM
emm.. to stephen, lisa and diondra, thanks a whole bunch for talking to me after it happened.
you guys are the best.
♥ 8:38 AM
i just broke up with kai yuan. i think reality hasnt set in yet. i cant think right now.. the truth, i dun even know if we are breaking up. his friend told me that he wanted me to go for another guy and he just said sorry.
i feel like going up to the top of the world and screaming my head off; to let the whole world know how much i do like him. gosh, i'm nuts. but really, i cant explain how i'm feeling.. i like.. cant believe it i guess.. how can sumone change so fast? but perhaps, it is for the better. however, i cant believe that everything we have gone through is over, just like that. what does he seriously take me for? a toy?
i wanna hug onto a pillow.. -or maybe a friend- and cry and cry and cry; like there's no tomorrow. cry till my eyes get all red, my face all stained and i cant think properly. maybe that way, when i wake up the next day, i'll forget everything that ever happened and actually get on with my life. and then, i might have a brain and go fall in love with someone whom i know i will be able to get along with, someone whom i am able to love whole-heartly. but really, if anyone mentions his name at the moment, i might just be able to hate them, either that or i'll go all weird on them.
♥ 6:00 AM
sry i havent updated for a longg time.. the computer hanged on me.
i went ice-skating with ruth, pj, micole, amanda and damien along with his sister. when we go there, the place was totally packed. damien is really REALLY good on ice. he just skates like.. as though he's walking. me and ruth skated together, making faster rounds than the rest and when we passed them, we act all chirpy and go ' hi ' real loud. they get like kinda pissed cause they cant skate as fast. then after, when it was nearly time to go, ruth and i decided to play catching with damien. he took off like 20 seconds before we did and we could not catch him at all. he would be like.. 50cm away from me and when i reach out, he'll just skate away in the other direction!!
after, i played catching with ruth. she was supposed to catch me. it really is fun, being able to skate, pushing yourself to limit and still having to be careful not to fall.. we promised each other that we would have to go back and play catching again.
before that, in school, we had the in-line skating course. it was wayy fun. the instructor was really nice to talk to. he had names for us and was kinda.. wacky. we played a hockey match against him. all the 'advanced' skaters were on the same team and he was all alone. we trashed him 14 to 7 i think.. half way through, he said he needed to take a break and just sat down.. most of us followed and then, suddenly, he just jumped up from where he was sitting and skated to the ball. he is real good in skating and it was really hilarious playing with him. also, he promised us a 50% discount if we ever do buy skates from him.. actually i did the talking and asked him if he agreed.. i dun think he heard me.. haha.
on friday, i went out with ronald brandon and clare. not that i like any of the guys. strictly- no way. it wasnt really fun.. i kinda felt.. outta place the whole time. its hard to like feel comfortable when you're with boys you arent a fan of. what i did.. was kinda wacky.. and i really do wish i didnt do it. the reason? no one will know. its not some revenge kinda reason.. i dun scope THAT low..
hah
on wednesday, i went to lisa's house. we were supposed to be working on the jumble sale stuff but.. we got distracted ( again ). i was on the computer and mark asked me if i wanted jx sleeping picture. so of course i said yes. then we talked sumore and i ask him to send it to xi nan's phone. me and xi nan had a good laugh. the picture really looks funny.. anyway, we were supposed to pay mark 1.50 for the picture and so i asked xi nan to do it. she was like 'mark mark mark mark mark' until she finally got his attention and i was in front so i saw jx looking at me. he like had the 'qian bian' face.. i dunno how he does it.. but i ended up laughing real loud.
before i went home from lisa's house, i was DRAGGED to the playground by amanda and xi nan. they wanted me to go talk to kai yuan but seriously, he's the guy.. why do i have to make the first move? sara always says that it is the 21 century and girls can make the first move but.. i out-right disagree. i didnt see him that day( at the playground ) but i did see syu kuan.. even he knew that kai yuan wouldnt do anything.. we were like fighting for the computer at lisa's house to talk to him.. it was.. fun. i also heard stephen's voice.. his laugh i guess.
my brother wants the computer now.. buh bye.
i just broke up with kai yuan. i think reality hasnt set in yet. i cant think right now.. the truth, i dun even know if we are breaking up. his friend told me that he wanted me to go for another guy and he just said sorry.